Canada's Only Grammy

By now you've probably heard that "Canada's Only Grammy" this year went to Gordie Sampson, bless his heart, for co-writing the country hit "Jesus Takes the Wheel" with two other people.

The fuss about this highlights, in my view, how pathetic is our national predilection for hanging on this sort of thing as if it mattered much to our collective identity. Did you know that one of the eleven nominated "Canadians" was Neil Young, bless his heart, who hasn't lived here for decades?

To hear the CBC, for one, force themselves to applaud this showing rang a little hollow to me. For one thing, "Jesus Take The Wheel" is a Christian song. For another, it's a country song. I have nothing against either of those things, but normally, neither gets much play on the national broadcaster. Add in the sentimental lyric and pop production, and it would be "three strikes you're out" under normal circumstances. So it's no wonder Canada's Only (partial) Grammy got only partial play on Sounds Like Canada, despite all the well-wishing.

I do hope the very talented Mr. Sampson gets rich and spends his money locally, back in Canada where he sometimes lives. That would be good for everyone.

For my part, as a far less successful Canadian songwriter, bless my heart, I'm going to try to revive our national pride by doing something Canadians DO excel at: taking an existing successful idea, making it inclusive, and flogging it to death.

To wit, here are some suggested titles for future red & white Grammy contenders:

Buddha, Change My Tire!
Kosher Convoy
Night Drive To Mecca
Lady Maddonna, Standing on My Dash
Put Your Hands in The Hands (Of Shiva The Crossing Guard)

Lather, rinse, repeat...