What happened last night

What happened last night was, I was out hosting the jam, like every Wednesday. And like every Wednesday this one was special, because more than 20 people came out and put away their fears and allowed themselves to be fragile and brave and to share music and company and to make together the music we love so much.

And what happened last night was the words that were mine to say came mostly in the right places, sometimes not the way I would have liked, but still, I got taken aside and told that we were doing great things, and that my part of it made a difference for people, and that it was appreciated and needed.

Then what happened last night was, a few of us stayed on when the workshops were done, basking a bit in the glow of what had gone on. And then we got out the instruments and because some of us are best buddies and some are new friends, we shared some tunes to give us common ground. And we started to really play.

We played tunes we knew and tunes we didn't know, and included our friends in the circle, and we all splashed a bit of beer into us. It really started to sound good, not just in the ordinary way, but in the extraordinary way that's what we're all seeking in the music, every time, but it doesn't happen every time, and when it does you need to be there for it no matter what, or it's gone and you miss it so badly it hurts.

And then, what happened last night, was the bar staff, who are so patient and open and who grin like happy fools to watch the way we light the fires inside and among the people who come to find and to share the music... they wanted to hear songs too, songs just for them, and who could say no?

Especially when a little more beer got splashed around and they were singing too, not just mumbling along but really singing, giving as much as we were giving and getting that much and more. And now the circle was complete, and the music and the moment were one.

Of course what happened last night was that the circle of the day was complete before the circle of our hearts and voices, and we saw midnight come and go, we waved at it before we leaped into the chorus of Halleliuah, and it might have been hours later when we all came up for air.

But we were singing Halleluiah! Really singing it, meaning it, loving it. In a bar on a quiet stretch of Queen Street in Toronto, late at night in the middle of the week it's true, but it was church and temple and sweat lodge all rolled into one, and if the spirit descends on a Wednesday night, not a Sunday morning who are we to argue?

Here's what happened last night: Strangers became friends; music became worship; libation became sacrament; humanity became divinity... that's how it felt, anyway. And the only price to pay was the lonely happy fulfilled and fearful feeling of that long walk back home.

Wondering how it would be this time, when in the clarity of the bright day's morning sun, it was time to make sense of what happened last night.